Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Here goes nothing!

So, I've decided to jump on the bandwagon and start a blog. I figure why not? I love to write, my life sometimes seems like a giant joke, so I feel like others may get some entertainment from it, and I feel it will help hold myself accountable to all of my goals if it's out there for the world to see. We shall see. I think it may also help "unjumble" my mind, if that's a word. My mind has so many ideas and thoughts, it's exhausting at times. It is a little bit of a vulnerable feeling, knowing I will be letting others into my mind, but I think it will also be freeing as well.

Since we are at the start of a new year, I have, as always, set some new life goals. I'm going to try and not make mine so general this time, and I'm really going to try and make them goals that are not only attainable, but will help enhance my life. I've had a bit of a midlife crisis at age 26- 4 years away from 30 has made me a bit nervous. Being an extremist as well as a perfectionist has me realizing the years are going by way too fast, and there is never enough time in the day to get to all I want to do. Also, losing a family member in 2008 has given me an even more intense "live life to the fullest" attitude, and has made me want to never, ever, EVER take a single part of life, whether it be a person, thing or emotion, for granted. I feel I have accomplished many things that I am willing to admit I am proud of, but not nearly enough. And my life is certainly not headed in the direction I had imagined it would be at 26 years old. That isn't neccesarily a bad thing, but it has required me to re-adjust some of my goals. So for 2010, my aspirations are as follows:

1) Travel- a lot. I am assuming there will come to a point where my life will be tying me down quite a bit more than it currently is (maybe it won't), and I want to take advantage of my freedom while I have it. My brother Brent recently backpacked around Belize on a whim, and that is one of the most admirable things he has ever done, in my opinion. He just packed up with a friend and left, and had one of the most incredible experiences of his life. I regret not joining him. I am happy with my first 3 years in North Carolina- I have tried to explore as many beaches and mountains as time has allowed, but there is still more that I want to see. Instead of having wasted weekends on the couch, I want to see it all. I only wish I could afford more plane tickets. I am proud of in the last 3 years, I have made a genuine effort to visit friends throughout the country, and I will hold those memories dear. I was able to see New York City, California, Lake Tahoe, Daytona, Raleigh, Boston, Asheville, Las Vegas, Michigan, and a few other places. On my bucket list of places to visit where friends live are California (again), Montana, Kansas City, NYC (again- which might happen if I get in to the marathon), Fort Benning and Nashville. I am hoping to make the majority of these happen in 2010. Vacations are wonderful, especially when you are able to catch up with long lost friends.

This is a picture of Brent in Belize. Isn't it incredible?

2) To make my body the most fit it has ever been in my whole life. This will be difficult considering I used to train 6-7 hours a day. Again, as I'm getting older, I'm starting to get stressed out. There will be a point in time where my body won't be able to lift as much weight, where it won't be able to handle my long workouts, and where my joints will begin to fail me. And that is one of my biggest fears. My body has been so durable my whole life. I can put it through hell and 99.9% of the time, it responds positively, and never lets me down. So, I would like to step it up this year, and see just how far I can push myself. I kind of fly by the seat of my pants when it comes to racing, such as entering a marathon a month before I plan on running it, while recovering from pneumonia. I completed it, yes. Could I have ran it faster? More than likely, yes. I am proud of my athletic accomplishments, but don't feel I have tapped into my full potential. I have had several athletic shortcomings that will stick with me for the rest of my life. For example, losing the state meet in the 100 breastroke by 3 one-hundredths of a second. Or missing the Olympic Trial cut in the 100 breastroke by 8 one-hundredths of a second. I'm done having moments like that. I know I can push my body far, and I plan on doing that this year. I finally sucked it up and signed up for my first triathlon, so we will see how that goes. I don't feel like it will be a problem, considering I run and swim frequently, and am decent on the bike. The Ironman is on my bucket list, as well as an ultra-marathon, so I figure there is no better time to get started on that list until now. So, to reach this goal, it will require me to be more consistent. For those of you who know me, or train with me, know I will jump on the bandwagon for a while, but then I just stop. Not in 2010! :) It will also require me maintain better sleeping and eating habits. I feel like if I have a concrete goal to work towards, it will help maintain these habits. I will be running a half marathon on April 10th with a goal of going 1:25, and if I get in to the NYC marathon, it will be to go a 3:15. Both should be fairly easy to attain if I maintain consistency in my training, eating and sleeping.

Finishing the Boston Marathon.

3) Read more. I used to be a giant book nerd, and I still read quite a bit, but not enough. And I don't want to read "fad" books. I want to read the classics, books that will inspire me, that will leave me thinking after I finish the last page. One of my best friends works for the Oxford Press, and has inspired me to be better about this. She always has a great book to talk about. Plus, I can't tell you how many people my age can't spell, and it drives me crazy. And it also has shown me that people in my generation do not read enough, and I will not be one of those people. I think reading keeps you on your toes, and that is a good place to be!

4) Say "I love you" more. No explanation needed.

5) Make more time for my friends. I feel I have the greatest friends in the whole world, and it's easy to get caught up in your life and not make time for that phone call or an hour for coffee. And that is unacceptable. I just need to do it, and make the time for it.

6) Attempt to be more easy-going. I usually am, but I tend to really freak out when there are are too many things going on out of my control. So my goal is to accept that there will be times where things happen that are truly out of my hands, and I just need to put the trust in God that if I am holding up everything the best I can, things will work out in the end, even if it doesn't feel like it.

7) Get back in school. I love school, I love learning, I love challenging my mind, and I miss it. Right now I am thinking a certificate in substance abuse counseling- I just need to make time for it.

8) Walk Laramie more. When I get tired, I tend to forget about her, and she is one of the most important things in my life. I need to remember, no matter how exhausted I feel at the end of the day, to spend time with her, because it is limited.

My girl.

9)Learn to play guitar (a pink one).

10)Make an effort to clean my room once a week. I get so busy I will leave it for a few weeks, and at that point, it becomes overwhelming, so I leave it for a few more weeks. I'm notorious for making piles. If I make a point to clean once a week, it will be easily maintained and I'm hoping it will help my life feel a little bit less chaotic.

11) Start cooking more. I have been told I'm a master microwaver. I need to work on that.

8) Lastly, go to bed each and EVERY night with the comfort of knowing I have lived to the fullest, given 100% in everything and have made a difference, no matter how big or small it is.

I'm sure there are more, but as you can see I am very verbose and my hands are getting tired. Thanks for reading!


  1. I'm so excited that you decided to start a blog!!! They're addicting! I'm your first follower and first comment! Can't wait Courtney!!!

  2. You will love blogging! It is a lot of fun and AMEN to your post!

  3. Aw thanks guys for your comments! I enjoy both of your blogs so much, so hopefully I will be able to write some posts that strike an interest with you as well. If you have any good blogs to follow, please let me know :) Also, how in the world do you get music on your page?

  4. Hey Courtney welcome to blogging! If you're looking for a good new book you should check out "Intellectuals and Society" by Thomas Sowell. He holds the Rose and Milton Friedman chair at Stanford's Hoover Institute. Sowell's book takes an in depth look at the negative role intellectuals play in society.